Create A New Story Of Sisterhood

Re-Post from 2012

Here is my personal story of surrender – it is a story that demonstrates the power of surrender and how every thought, action and word contributes to the social and spiritual fabric of our world.

On the morning of Sep 11th 2001 – I walked in to my youngest sons bedroom to see him witnessing the horror of the twin towers falling – he said “Mum look the US is being attacked.” I sat on the bed with him in disbelief – I wasn’t sure if it was real or not. Once I had come to terms with the fact that it was real – I then asked my self “who am I in conflict with, who is it that I need to make peace with right now.”

I knew at some level – however small, I had contributed to this madness – immediately a woman’s name came to mind, it was someone I had often been judgmental about. In that moment I handed it all to God, I said “I offer this to you God – I totally release this conflict within me and will be aware of my words from this moment on, I offer this to you to be healed.”

That morning I took my husband to the airport for work, both of us still in a state of shock. On the way back from the airport I thought I would visit St Peters Cathedral – which has a beautiful area at the back of the cathedral called The Lady Chapel. I had often visited The Lady Chapel – it is a wonderful place for women to go to when they need a little comfort and shelter from the harshness of the world.

I walked in to the chapel to find only one other person there – it was her – the woman I needed to make peace with. There we were both in the same place, at the same time, doing the same thing. She had her eyes closed, so I gently put my hand on her lap and whispered her name. She looked up at me and said so sweetly, “I thought you were The Madonna”. I smiled, made eye contact and moved on to enter my silence and be with my God. I will never forget the gift I was given that day – It was so powerful.

I tell that story often because it confirms to others and to myself the enormous power of synchronicity, I have no doubt that my experience that day was a direct message and blessing from GOD. I was given a gift; a wake up call, to get on with the work that I needed to do while here on our beautiful jewel, planet Earth.

The New Story Of Sisterhood starts with a chapter called “Surrender”.

Lets surrender up the old, so called sister story of competition, jealousy, she said, I said, what about, I hate it when and so on. Let’s say NO I don’t want to support or tell that old story anymore. The number one key to creating a new story is being prepared to let go of the old one. This is how I do it; I say to myself “give it up, give it up, give it up”. I surrender my life to the nature of God and I am free, I am free to be me.

As we confidently embrace our liberation as New Women, we can use this opportunity to connect with each other at a whole new level. We can start a new story that speaks of encouragement and tenderness toward each other as sisters. The sisters that went before us courageously made way for our liberation. Now it is up to us to truly embrace our present day sisters with our hearts wide open, proudly knowing they are our support team. I encourage you to stand naked in your truth and liberate your self some more. You have been born into a time like no other, don’t waste a second of your liberty sisters. Speak from your heart, walk tall and know that from your own personal liberty, you are helping to raise the self esteem of other women.

Our time here on earth is sacred and only a blink in the vastness of the cosmos. We are all blessed with many gifts and as we honor them in each other our power and beauty grows. Idle gossip and control tactics wont add value to any situation – our time here on earth is to love each other and express our individual passions. So let’s go forth with love and light in our hearts, bless the world with our many gifts and create a new story of sisterhood.

I invite you to share your ideas on what our new story may look like and how it is coming alive in your own life.

Your Vision Steers Your Leadership Style

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Do I really know what makes my heart sing?
  • What do I usually tell myself to avoid taking action?
  • What does my role as a New Style Leader give me?
  • How do I measure my improvements?
  • Do I believe I can make positive changes in the world?
  • What do I already know? What skills do I have?
  • What do I want to communicate and participant in?
  • What are my personal values?
  • What have I learned from my experience, and how can I apply that now?
  • What can I offer to support our team vision?
  • Do I need encouragement?
  • How do I feel about my current reality as a New Style Leader?
  • Am I happy in my role?
  • Where am I on my social and spiritual path?

These questions are to help you gain a clearer picture of what you may need as an up and coming New Style Leader, and what changes you may consider making to enhance your experience.

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Discovering your Creative Self.

Know yourself.Decide what your larger vision is.Think about what you value most in life, and how your current vision could match that value.

Brush up on techniques. Perhaps you might need to get advice in some areas, or some guidance. Talking to a mentor or spiritual counselor may help here. Or it may be time for you to become a mentor.

Keep a cool eye and a firm hand.Commit to a course of action with your team or perhaps you need to find a team and apply an ongoing strategy that will aid in keeping your focus as a team.

Enjoy your role as a New Style Leader. Reward yourself and feel good about what you have committed to and where you are heading.

Elizabeth Ellames

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Adding Value Is Good Business

Steve Jobs drew on many areas of social culture to see what the current trends were – and that’s because knowing what people value and desire in life, is what business is all about. If you forget what or why your business was created, your value will start to drop away.

Your Context Is Key !!

Be creative around your business and ask the important question…

“Why does my business exist?”

This question will always provide the appropriate WHAT, WHY and HOW to every solution. E.G.Ellames

 

Experience the Experience

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When my boys were young, like most children they developed the practice of wanting to share their new experiences. Be it drawing, riding a bike, climbing trees or skateboarding…. They wanted their Dad and I to share in their newfound experience.

In a way they were saying, “I’m here, I exist, I want to be seen and heard… I want to experience being experienced by you.” And as human beings, we never really lose that. Because we actually grow from the experience of being experienced.

We might be more sophisticated about how we do it or say it, but ultimately we want to let the world know that we are here and that we matter.

If we are promoting a product or service and are asking for people’s money or precious time — we must first see and value who they are. We need to know them as well as we know our self, as well as we know our family and friends.

We must master the art of identifying our clients/audience needs and then express and address those needs with absolute clarity.

Abraham Maslow the American psychologist share this many years ago. He was best known for creating Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs, a theory of psychological health, which suggested that the fulfilling of innate human needs in priority… resulted in self-actualization.

What follows is an adapted version from a branding point of view. Our brand needs to meet the needs of our audience; our tribe. It’s that simple! We need to identify three components of that understanding:

Desires – Recognition – Beliefs.

Theses elements – Desire, Recognition, and Beliefs are the three parts of your audience’s mind, which are the raw materials you work with to truly serve your audience and add value to their life.

First… DESIRE

When we are young children what we want makes up a large part of who we are. And of course, that doesn’t stop being true when we become an adult.

Desires have tremendous driving power and are always present. You cannot create them, diminish them or battle them. But we can expand them, sharpen them, channel them and give them a focus. To see your audience clearly, to hear the first signs of “Pick me, See me… I’m over here.”  We need to recognize what they need in order to feel valued.

What does your product or service provide your audience, which they actually want?

But it doesn’t stop there.

Second… RECOGNITION 

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And recognition can be even more powerful than raw desire. Each of us as human beings has a deep need to know where we belong. And when we don’t, we become uncomfortable and will do anything to correct that feeling.

What about tribes?

What role do we play… and what role do we want to play? How do others see us, and how do we see ourselves? Your brand is everything you communicate about your product or service, which means what you do counts more than what you say — because this is where the real point of connection is created.

Who does your product or service allow your audience to be?

I really love this question… I think it’s brilliant! This is where your audience decides, “Is this product or service something I would choose to identify with … or not?”

 Finally… BELIEF/VALUES

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If you want to see your audience or potential audience —respond with, Yes.. I See You Clearly! — connecting your beliefs/values is the best way to do that. Recognition was the primary driver of marketing in the 20th century, but it is belief/values that are the biggest driver today.

Currently, everything you do is transparent (because of the web) remember that you are communicating your beliefs through everything you do. The Real Deal motto around branding is… we are what we share and we share if we care.

What are the beliefs/values that formed your product or service?

Are you speaking to an audience that shares those beliefs/values?

If you want to influence… you must connect first. Yes… our audience is now serious grown-ups… But that small child inside them still has deep desires and a need for recognition. Good business is built on good relationships and good relationships form a sound community and there you have it – A TRIBE!

  • Demonstrating what you believe in will make that unbreakable connection.
  • Show them the role they can play and the tribe they can belong to.
  • Let them know that you can give them what they want.

Show your audience that you see them — you recognize, respect and reference them… and let them know that they are in the right place.

CONTACT ME TODAY

Tel 040 330 9696

elizabeth.ellames@ozemail.com.au

 

 

Goodbye to Gossip

 

Hello Integrity….. Dear old gossip has become an addiction for many women.

It is seductive and builds an unhealthy intimacy among women, which creates false security. I believe the female species will come to a place of contentment when this persistent obstacle is corrected and transformed.

Gossip is connected to these four faces of addiction.

  • boredom
  • competition
  • drama
  • low self-esteem

Realizing this is the first step to healing the addiction – from there we can choose to participate in it or not.

It is said the point of power is in the present and poor old Gossip is never in the present she is always going on about what was said or happened in the past. She weaves her words for the purpose of separation, which create a divide in friendships, family and community.

Gossip keeps everyone small and is always driven by fear. Women have relied on gossip to define their position in society and culture for centuries, but it is not necessary anymore. Women now have the opportunity to rise up out of this unproductive damaging behavior and create a new and prosperous culture for all women.

Gossip is a shadow deity whose time and face has come to an end. She has upgraded to the face of “Integrity”, who is evolving into the New Woman, the New Humanity and therefore there is no place for these old behaviors.

I say it is time to put our temptation to spread rumors to bed and start being more creative with our female conversations, after all, we are extremely creative beings.

For the record, the gossip on me is “why does she always have to be… so in ya’ face” well my response to that is – at least it’s to your face and not behind your back and bitchin’ in the kitchen so to speak.

Guess it all started with that wicked old queen in the story of Snow White who’s famous last words were “Mirror, Mirror on the wall who’s the fairest of them all” now she had a serious bitchin’ addiction.

Hope you can take this refreshing idea into your relationships and watch them bloom into something far greater than girly catch ups.

 

Real Deal Men and Women

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Is evolution handing the reins over to women?

If we lift the veil on our Planet… what do we see right now?

The dominant profit-over-people systems are going through major breakdowns. Humanity’s 5,000-year abuse of power and masculine/feminine imbalance is coming to an end. People are waking up to a new wave of consciousness.

How do we deal with this change?

First, we need to disconnect from the emotional entanglement of the old. Then recognize that we are at the end of a cycle, which is what we need to do in order for the new to be born.

How do we facilitate this new way of being in the world?

The old way has conditioned women to feel powerless. But their nature, in fact, has always been powerful. Women have the ability to access power from the depths of their intuition, they hold within their bodies a great creative potential, and can exercise power through a balanced open heart. Women know how to connect, for they are the masters of emotion.

Women innately have the power of creation within them.

At present women are being asked to stand strong. Not to stand against something, but to stand up and be REAL DEAL women. On their own, women can’t heal the violation of our planet or bring peace to the whole world. But every woman willing to direct her passion, mission, heart’s desire, life’s work can facilitate the change we need. Together we can create a new story for humanity, one where a woman stands strong in their true leadership potential.

The old way has caused women to compete against each other. It is time for women to throw off their conditioning, reach out to each other, and collaborate. Collectively standing in their power creates connection and with this increase of Unity, the old power structures will fall away.

Is it time for women to stop asking for permission and time to start asking for support?

The New Woman is bringing forth the New Man; at the moment men have a very different task also, which is to reclaim the power of their heart. They too are experiencing this new and often challenging transformation, which is forcing us to respect each other even more. Their role is to increasingly honor women while they go about their life purpose and to honor their own male process and responses, which is being activated by the emerging feminine power that is upon us.

So what does the future hold?

Who really knows, but what we can do is focus on what works, as the old ways change for the better and make way for a new way of being… women and men alike—have a window of opportunity: the opportunity to dream a new world rooted in the energy of a higher heart, the souls calling, the balance of the feminine/masculine that is created through the gift of revere, recognition and respect.

There is no question that a new world will emerge. The only question is: What part do we want to play in it?

Are you ready to be a REAL DEAL man and woman?

Do you always live your life in the present moment?

Can you identify and communicate your story and your brand clearly?

REAL DEAL productions have been created for the purpose of helping men and women to identify, clarify, specify, edify and unify their purpose-based brand. The clearer you are around your time, energy and purpose the more value you can contribute to your own life and the lives of others.

Elizabeth Ellames 

 

Growing A New Humanity

FREE your fear

FREE your fear of failure

and live a life of FAITH…

1533778_10202674105475106_1093690744_n  Elizabeth Ellames

“Keep The Faith” – Michael Jackson

If You Call Out Loud
Will It Get Inside
Through The Heart Of Your Surrender
To Your Alibis
And You Can Say The Words
Like You Understand
But The Power’s In Believing
So Give Yourself A Chance
‘Cause You Can
Climb The Highest Mountain
Swim The Deepest Sea, Hee
All You Need Is The Will To Want It
And Uhh, Little Self-Esteem
So Keep The Faith
Don’t Let Nobody Turn You ‘Round
You Gotta Know When It’s Good To Go
To Get Your Dreams Up Off The Ground
Keep The Faith, Baby, Yea
Because It’s Just
A Matter Of Time
Before Your Confidence Will Win Out
Believe In Yourself
No Matter What It’s Gon’ Take
You Can Be A Winner
But You Got To Keep The Faith
…Gon’ Keep It Brother
You Got It
And When You Think Of Trust
Does It Lead You Home
To A Place That You Only Dream Of
When You’re All Alone
And You Can Go By Feel
‘Stead Of Circumstance
But The Power’s In Beliving
So Give Yourself A Chance
I Know That You Can Sail Across The Water
Float Across The Sky, High
Any Road That You Take
Will Get You There
If You Only Try
So Keep The Faith, Ow
Don’t Let Nobody Take You Down,Brother
Just Keep Your Eyes On The Prize
And Your Feet Flat On The Ground
Keep The Faith, Baby, Yea
Because It’s Just A Matter Of Time
Before Your Confidence Will Win Out
I Told My Brother How To Do The Thing Right
Lift Up Your Head And Show The World You Got Pride
Go For What You Want
Don’t Let ‘Em Get In Your Way
You Can Be A Winner
But You Got To Keep The Faith
Gon’ Keep It Brother
You Got It
I Know That Keepin’ The Faith
Means Never Givin’ Up On Love
But The Power That Love Has To Make It Right
Makes It Makes It Right
Keep The Faith
Don’t Let Nobody Turn You ‘Round Brother
You Got To KnowWhen It’s Good To Go
To Get Your Dreams Up Off The Ground
Keep The Faith Baby, Yea
Because It’s Just A Matter Of Time
Before Your Confidence Will Win Out
Better Stand Up And Act Like You Wanna Do Right
Don’t Play The Fool For The Rest Of Your Life
Work On It Brother And You’ll Make It Someday
Go For What You Want
And Don’t Forget The Faith
Look At Yourself
And What You Doin’ Right Now
Stand Back A Minute
Just To Check Yourself Out
Straighten Out Your Life
And How You’re Livin’ Each Day
Get Yourself Together
‘Cause You Got To Keep The Faith
Uh, Uh, Uh
Don’t Let Nobody Take You Down, Brother
Just Keep Your Eyes On The Prize
And Your Feet Flat On The Ground
Keep The Faith, Baby, Yea
Because It’s Just A Matter Of Time
Before Your Confidence Will Win Out
Lift Up Your Mind
Before Your Mind Gets Blown
Some Things In Life
You Best Just Leave Them Alone
Go For What You Want
Don’t Let It Get In Your Way
You Can Make It Happen
But Ya Got Ta Keep The Faith
Gon’ Keep It Brother
You Got To Keep The Faith
Yeah Keep The Faith
Gon’ Keep It Sister
You Got To Keep The Faith
Now, Now
I’ll Show My Brotha
How To Do The Thing Right
Lift Up Your Head
And Show The World You Got Pride
Go For What You Want
Don’t Let ‘Em Get In Your Way
You Can Be A Winner
If You Keep The Faith
Straighten Out Yourself
And Get Your Mind On Track
Dust Off Your Butt
And Get Your Self-Respect Back
You’ve Known Me Long Enough
To Know That I Don’t Play
Take It Like You Want It
But You Got To Keep The Faith Gon’
Don’t Let Nobody Take You Down
Just Keep Your Eyes On The Prize
And Get Your Feet Back On The Ground
Keep The Faith, Baby, Yea
Because It’s Just A Matter Of Time
Before Your Confidence Will Win Out
But Till That Day I Said You’ve Got To Keep The Faith!

The Power of Mentoring

WHAT I KNOW FOR SURE 

About 10 years ago I was asked by a beautiful and enthusiastic young woman if I would be one of her spiritual mentors.

At first, I thought “Do I have time for it? ” “Am I good enough to do such a job?” “Does one get paid for something like this?”

You know how it is – Blah Blah Blah! 

Because it set off so many different thought processes, I knew I needed to step back and have a good look at what was really happening here. I then saw how my ego (fear) was tripping me up.

Once I had given myself some time to be still and see what I was really being asked to do – it was clear. For someone to ask you to mentor them is a God-given privilege and an honorable duty to be accepted with grace.

The process of meeting with this delightful young woman was actually a gift to me as well; it has moved me forward on my own journey. It became very clear to me that it is a natural and essential way for humans to interact and grow.

Since then I have been asked to mentor 2 other young women and I look forward to each of their visits with absolute excitement. I am sure that it is our lack of connection with each other, which has caused most of our social problems.

Unfortunately, some parents don’t even recognize that they are mentors for their children and I think if the aged population had a young person visiting them for mentoring once a week or fortnight they to would be alive with purpose and act in ways they didn’t know were possible. Simply listening to the thoughts and perspectives of a young person would help to stimulate their thinking and expand their world.

And of course, the wisdom and stories that an elder can pass on are equally as valuable to our youth.

After my first year of mentoring… I came to the conclusion that  ‘If we are not mentoring, we need to be mentored’ it is a continuum so to speak. A giving back to the world, your community, through your life experiences. A giving and receiving process that comes with a level of respect that one can’t find anywhere else in life.

I strongly believe that the rightful practice of mentoring in our world is the key to true human sustainability. What follows is a small piece I wrote on the matter:

_________________________

Through the simple act of being a Mentor or being Mentored, we uncover our true purpose in life. It is from this revered action of commitment and appreciation that an individual’s generosity and integrity abound. From our somewhat hidden nature, we find strength and gain unity. We miraculously blossom and move forward with hope in our hearts for the generations to come.

Heart to Heart Elizabeth Ellames

Panning for GOLD

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Objectively –

meaning: using facts and not influenced by personal feelings or beliefs: 

impartially, neutrally, fairly, justly, without prejudice, with an open mind, equitably, without fear or favour, even-handedly, without bias – to view a situation objectively.

 A pile of nice shiny gold bars

So often we suffer over troubling situations, we go over and over what we could say to this person or that. We think up all sorts of scenarios of how they should or could be. We relentlessly try to come up with ways to control outcomes. We create enormous stories in our mind that can last for decades, which in most cases wont make one ounce of difference, except for depleting our energy levels and taking up our time.

I have come up with a very quick and effective tool for dealing with situations that are in emotional entanglement. I call it “panning for GOLD”.
It is a 6 step process that goes like this…
  • Decide to view the situation objectively. 
  • Take all the names, relationships and who did what out of the situation.
  • What are the facts that are present?
  • Wait for a moment for the unwanted matter to fall away in your mind.
  • Allow the truth to come to the surface.
  • What is left is only the GOLD of the situation.

Here is an example…

A friend asks you over for dinner, they don’t give you a time of arrival. When you phone to make arrangements they don’t answer your calls. Last time you went to their place for a meal they had been drinking all day and forgot you were coming. You feel very uncomfortable about the whole situation, you do care about this person and are worried about their drinking, but you don’t want to get stuck at their place hungry and angry again.

Let’s GOLD pan this situation…

  • This person clearly isn’t reliable.
  • Evaluate the situation – is this a friendship or a co-dependency?
  • If I want to remain friends, I will need to call the shots.
  • Is this my problem?
  • Remove myself from the emotional entanglement.
  • The gift here is that I have repeatedly witnessed the history … and can now stop participating in it.

The gold in this particular experience is very clear – there is always a CHOICE POINT.

Try this tool of empowerment in your life and see if you can strike some GOLD!!

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